7 Hidden Causes of Hyperactivity in Kids and What to Do About It

Inside: Navigating the world of hyperactivity in kids can be challenging for parents. This post reveals seven hidden causes of hyperactivity, explaining why some very active toddlers struggle to find calm or why school-aged kids can’t sit still in a classroom. By understanding these the causes, you can develop strategies to support your child’s unique needs. Scroll to the bottom to download a free Hyperactive Active Kid Toolkit for additional support.

When my teenage son was in first grade, his teacher suggested we have him evaluated for ADHD because he was a very active kid. 

This didn’t just start in Kindergarten. He was also a high-energy toddler and his preschool teacher often mentioned his hyperactivity. I had no idea where to go so I started with his pediatrician. The process felt rushed and impersonal – three questionnaires filled out by adults who interacted with him, a brief consultation, and suddenly we had a diagnosis. 

How could you truly know what’s going on in a child’s brain by other people’s opinions of him? 

Read Next: What I Wish I Knew as a Mom to a Very High Energy Toddler

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Since he was our first child, we weren’t aware of the other treatments, diagnostic processes, or therapies available for ADHD. Honestly, that diagnosis didn’t seem to be as prevalent as it is today, only fifteen years later when it feels like they hand that diagnosis out like candy. 

The pediatrician gave us two solutions: medication or coffee. I couldn’t believe it!

I even pushed back asking what else we could do and he told me, “There’s nothing else you can do for ADHD.” There was zero conversation about the root causes of my son’s high amounts of energy or what else could help him focus and calm his body.

My mom-intuition told me otherwise. 

My son’s brain was still developing, and I couldn’t shake the feeling that there had to be more to the story than a simple chemical imbalance.

Instead, I devoured content on the subject, learning about executive function, impulsivity, giftedness, neurodivergence, sensory systems, and more. I became my son’s biggest advocate teaching him how to speak up for his own needs. Most importantly, we learned the root causes of his high energy and how to give him the resources he needed to thrive in any environment.

And I never stopped learning as I started to help more and more parents do the same. 

What Transformed My Beliefs About Hyperactivity in Kids

Recently, I read “The Boy Crisis” by Dr. Warren Farrell and Dr. John Gray. One of the last sections is about ADHD. It’s written by Dr. Gray, called, “ADHD: Treatment With or Without Medication.” 

Reading The Boy Crisis completely transformed my understanding of hyperactivity. 

Instead of viewing ADHD (or undiagnosed hyperactive behavior) as simply a disorder to be medicated, Dr. Gray introduced a revolutionary perspective: what we call ADHD could actually be called inhibited dopamine function, influenced by various environmental and physiological factors.

This revelation sent me down a path of deep research into the many hidden causes of hyperactivity in children. 

What I discovered was eye-opening: hyperactive behavior isn’t always what it seems. 

Sometimes it’s a response to the environment, sometimes it’s linked to nutrition, and sometimes it’s simply a different way of processing the world.

The 7 Hidden Causes of Hyperactivity In Kids

In this post, we’ll explore seven often-overlooked causes of hyperactivity in children, and more importantly, what you can do about it if you have a high-energy toddler or kid. I know kids who haven’t been diagnosed with ADHD but still have high levels of energy and activity. So whether your child has been diagnosed with ADHD or you’re simply trying to understand their crazy amounts of energy, discovering the cause(s) could be the key to helping your child thrive! 

1. Parenting Style: The Hidden Impact of How We Parent

Many parents are surprised to learn that their parenting approach can significantly influence their child’s activity levels and ability to self-regulate. While it’s crucial to note that no parent is to blame for their child’s hyperactivity, understanding how different parenting styles affect behavior can empower us to make positive changes.

Labeling your parenting style may put you in a box that is unhelpful so please know there’s a lot of nuance around these generalized parenting styles. I also list them so it can help you understand what is unhelpful if you are raising a hyperactive child. 

The Permissive Parenting Trap

When children lack clear boundaries and consistent routines, they often struggle to develop internal regulation skills. Permissive parenting, characterized by few rules and minimal structure, can increase hyperactive behavior. Without the security of knowing what to expect, children may become more anxious and active as they test limits and seek boundaries.

When looking at the type of parenting I coach parents on, which would fall under conscious parenting, positive parenting, gentle parenting, or what I call, brain-based parenting, people often mistake it for permissive parenting. The approaches to raising children are very different! Just because you are conscious or gentle does not mean you are permissive, meaning your child has zero boundaries or guard rails. 

Authoritarian Approach to Parenting 

On the flip side, an overly strict or authoritarian parenting style can trigger hyperactivity through different mechanisms. Many adults I know over the age of 35 were parented this way so it’s hard to break generational patterns of, “Do what I say, not what I do” or “I am the boss” mindsets. 

When children feel consistently controlled or criticized, they may respond with high energy and increased physical activity as a way to release stress or assert independence. Or if a kid has an extra sensitive nervous system or a high need for autonomy and agency, this type of parenting will not work. If anything, Permissive parenting will exacerbate their hyperactivity and their need to be in control. 

This style can also lead to anxiety, which often manifests as restlessness and difficulty focusing.

The Sweet Spot: Authoritative Parenting

Research consistently shows that authoritative parenting balances clear boundaries with emotional warmth and age-appropriate autonomy. It also helps children develop better self-regulation skills. This approach provides the structure hyperactive children need while nurturing their emotional development.

Read Next: The Real Reason Parenting is Hard and How to Make It Easier

What You Can Do Today

1. Provide emotional safety | Create an environment where your child feels safe expressing their feelings and struggles. When children know their emotions are valid and accepted, they’re often better able to manage their physical energy levels. Become your child’s emotion coach! 
2. Discover the root causes of your child’s hyperactivity | Ask questions, continue reading this blog post, and figure out what is causing the hyperactivity so you can provide resources to support your child’s needs. 
3. Establish clear routines | Create predictable daily schedules that help your child feel secure and know what to expect. This doesn’t mean rigid hour-by-hour planning, but rather consistent patterns for important daily activities like meals, homework, and bedtime. Download my free daily schedules here! 
4. Set reasonable boundaries | Implement clear, age-appropriate rules and consequences, but remain flexible enough to consider your child’s individual needs. Remember, the goal is to create a framework that supports your child’s development, not to control their every move.
5. Practice positive reinforcement | Instead of constantly correcting hyperactive behavior, focus on catching and giving process praise in moments when your child shows self-regulation. This builds their confidence and reinforces the behaviors you want to see.
6. Adjust your expectations | Remember that every child develops differently. What works for one family may not work for another. Be willing to adapt your parenting style to meet your child’s unique needs while maintaining consistent boundaries. 

Work With Me!
I’d love to have you join my 12-week P.U.R.P.O.S.E. Parent Transformation Program! This program will equip you with tools to confidently manage big emotions, create a peaceful home environment, and prioritize your own well-being, taking parenting from a source of stress to a journey of growth and connection. Join the waitlist here!

The Long-Term View

Changing parenting styles takes time and patience. You might not see immediate results, but consistent, balanced parenting creates a foundation for better self-regulation skills that will serve your child throughout their life. It has taken me years to undo the paradigms I grew up with. 

Remember, the goal isn’t to eliminate your child’s natural energy but to help them channel it in healthy, productive ways through connection.

2. Nutrient Deficiency: The Brain-Body Connection

When we talk about the causes of hyperactivity in kids, one of the last things parents consider is nutrition. My mind was truly blown when I looked at high-energy kids and their hyperactivity under this lens.

Emerging research shows that what we feed our children’s bodies directly impacts how their brains function, particularly regarding dopamine, the neurotransmitter responsible for focus, motivation, and emotional regulation.

Understanding Dopamine Function

Imagine dopamine as your child’s brain’s reward and motivation system. When this system isn’t functioning optimally, children might experience:

• Difficulty sitting still
• Problems focusing on tasks
• Impulsive behavior
• Emotional dysregulation
• Stimulation-seeking behaviors

What many parents don’t realize is that proper dopamine function relies heavily on specific nutrients, and many children’s diets may be lacking in these crucial elements especially if you live in the U.S. where there are so many more chemicals allowed in our food than other countries around the world. **At the time I’m writing this post, some of this is FINALLY starting to change!

Essential Nutrients for Brain Function

The brain requires several key nutrients to produce and regulate dopamine effectively:

Protein-Rich Foods 

Your child’s body needs amino acids from protein to create dopamine. Without sufficient protein, the brain struggles to maintain proper dopamine levels. Foods rich in tyrosine (an amino acid crucial for dopamine production) include:

• Eggs
• Fish
• Lean meats
• Legumes
• Greek yogurt

Omega-3 Fatty Acids 

These essential fats are crucial for brain cell communication and reducing inflammation that can impact dopamine function. Sources include:

• Wild-caught fatty fish
• Chia seeds
• Flaxseeds
• Walnuts

B Vitamins 

B vitamins, particularly B6, B9 (folate), and B12, are essential for dopamine production and regulation. Find them in:

• Leafy greens
• Whole grains
• Nutritional yeast
• Eggs

Minerals 

Iron, magnesium, and zinc play crucial roles in dopamine function and overall brain health. Good sources include:

• Pumpkin seeds
• Dark leafy greens
• Red meat
• Oysters – although I’m not sure how many kids like oysters, I sure don’t! 

Common Nutrient Deficiencies That May Increase Hyperactivity in Kids

Iron Deficiency 

Even mild iron deficiency can affect dopamine function and lead to increased hyperactivity. Studies have shown that children with ADHD often have lower iron levels than their peers.

Magnesium Deficiency 

Known as “nature’s calming mineral,” magnesium deficiency can manifest as restlessness and difficulty focusing.

Zinc Deficiency 

Zinc is crucial for dopamine regulation, and deficiency has been linked to attention and behavior issues.

What You Can Do Today

1. Keep a food diary | Track your child’s behavior in relation to their diet. Look for patterns between certain foods and increased hyperactivity.
2. Focus on whole foods and clean eating | Prioritize unprocessed foods rich in the nutrients mentioned above. Avoid ultra-processed foods altogether. Remember, supplements can help but shouldn’t replace a balanced diet.
3. Consider testing | Work with a healthcare provider to test for specific nutrient deficiencies, especially if your child shows persistent hyperactive behavior. We did this through a naturopath and discovered many deficiencies and sensitivities from my son’s blood work results. 
4. Implement gradual changes | Start with one dietary improvement at a time. Sudden dramatic changes can be overwhelming for both parent and child. And for your child’s gut!
5. Make it fun | Involve your child in meal planning and preparation. This can help them feel more invested in making healthy choices.

I wasn’t surprised that my autistic son’s blood work showed a high sensitivity to gluten. However, it was a BATTLE at first to cut it out of his diet so I met him where he was at and slowly replaced the food he was eating with gluten with alternatives. 

Beyond Diet: Environmental Factors

Remember that nutrients aren’t absorbed in isolation. Stress, sleep quality, and physical activity all affect how well your child’s body utilizes the nutrients they consume. This brings us to our next hidden cause of hyperactivity: the environment.

3. Environment: The Impact of Stress and Anxiety

Modern children face unprecedented levels of stress and anxiety, which can manifest as hyperactive behavior. Understanding how environmental factors influence your child’s behavior is crucial for creating supportive solutions.

Common Environmental Stressors

Today’s academic environment can place immense pressure on children. Between high amounts of homework and high-stakes testing, many kids constantly feel like their being evaluated. The push for top grades and advanced placement classes adds another layer of stress, especially when children feel they’re competing with their peers for academic success.

This is why we have chosen alternatives to traditional education for our kids such as microschooling, hybrid schooling, and homeschooling. More on this later.

Social challenges create another significant source of stress for children. They navigate complex peer relationships while dealing with the ever-present influence of social media. Bullying, whether in person or online, can create high levels of anxiety and hyperactivity in kids. Even positive friendships can become stressful as children work to maintain their social standing and manage shifting group dynamics.

Family life, though meant to be a source of support, can inadvertently contribute to a child’s stress levels. When parents are stressed, children often absorb that tension. Sibling relationships add another complex dynamic, especially when children feel they’re competing for attention or resources. We feel that in this house with three boys. 

Major family transitions like moves, divorces, or new siblings can create additional stress. Even the daily juggling of family schedules and activities can leave children feeling overwhelmed and overstimulated.

Regular family meetings can reduce stress and anxiety! Grab my free Family Meeting Agenda here when you sign up for my weekly newsletter.

How Stress Manifests as Hyperactivity

When children feel overwhelmed, their bodies enter a state of heightened arousal. This can look like:

• Inability to sit still
• Constant movement or fidgeting
• Difficulty focusing
• Rapid speech or interrupting
• Emotional outbursts

What You Can Do Today

1. Assess your child’s schedule | Look for sources of stress and overwhelm. Are there activities that can be eliminated or modified?
2. Create calming rituals | Establish daily practices that help your child decompress and process their experiences. It’s a good thing for your chlid to be bored! 
3. Monitor external influences | Be aware of how various environments (school, activities, social situations) affect your child’s stress levels.
4. Advocate, advocate, advocate | When necessary, work with teachers and other caregivers to ensure your child’s environment supports their needs.
5. Model stress management | Show your child healthy ways to handle stress by managing your own stress effectively.
6. Provide coping skills | Your child may need coping skills to manage his or her big behavior caused by hyperactivity.  

Remember, environmental changes often require time to show results. Stay consistent with your approach while remaining flexible enough to adjust as needed.

4. Screen Time: The Digital Dimension of Hyperactivity

In her groundbreaking book “Reset Your Child’s Brain,” psychiatrist Dr. Victoria Dunckley discovered something fascinating: many children diagnosed with ADHD showed remarkable improvement after doing a digital detox (which we’ve had to do twice). 

Her research reveals that excessive screen time can create a set of symptoms she calls Electronic Screen Syndrome (ESS), which closely mimics ADHD and other behavioral disorders.

The Science Behind Screen-Induced Hyperactivity

Screen time affects children’s brains in multiple ways. The constant stimulation from fast-paced content, bright lights, and interactive features can overwhelm the nervous system. This overstimulation often manifests as:

• Difficulty transitioning between activities
• Increased irritability and mood swings
• Problems with attention and focus
• Physical restlessness
• Sleep disruption
• High amounts of energy in kids

Most parents I know who let their kids have screen time have experienced their kids losing their minds after playing or when told they had to turn it off. Growing up, I saw these behaviors in my brother when he played much less stimulating Nintendo games compared to what kids have access to today.

It seems like the gaming companies do this on purpose – the more kids play, the more money they make. If you’re looking for a book about this, I have two great recommendations! How to Raise a Healthy Gamer: End Power Struggles, Break Bad Screen Habits, and Transform Your Relationship with Your Kids by Alok Kanojia and Glow Kids: How Screen Addiction Is Hijacking Our Kids – and How to Break the Trance by Nicholas Kadaras. 

Signs Your Child Might Need a Digital Reset

Watch for these indicators that screen time might be affecting your child’s behavior:

• Increased agitation after screen use
• Difficulty winding down for sleep
• Resistance to non-screen activities
• Emotional outbursts when screen time ends
• Decreased interest in physical activities

What You Can Do Today

1. Implement a digital detox | Dr. Dunckley’s research shows that a complete break from screens – typically 3-4 weeks – can reset a child’s nervous system. While this might seem daunting, many families report significant improvements in their children’s behavior, focus, and emotional regulation after the detox period.
2. Create healthy screen habits | Once you’ve reset your child’s screen exposure, establish sustainable guidelines that encourage healthy screen habits. 
3. Set clear boundaries around screen time | Follow the American Academy of Pediatrics guidelines: no more than 1-2 hours per day for school-age children. Set boundaries like implementing a “tech sunset” – no screens at least one hour before bedtime to protect sleep quality
4. Create screen-free zones and times | Designate bedrooms as no-screen zones to protect sleep habits. Also, keep mealtimes sacred – no phones, tablets, or TV during family meals. 
5. Prioritize outdoor play and physical activity | Aim for at least one hour of outdoor time a day even if you have extreme weather conditions as it’s still important to get outside! Dress accordingly. 
6. Choose age-appropriate content | Use trusted review sites like Common Sense Media to evaluate apps, games, and shows
7. Model healthy screen use | Take the steps you need to have healthy screen habits. I recently read, “How to Break Up With Your Phone” and followed what she taught which has been incredibly helpful in reducing my own screen time especially around my kids. 

Related: The Best Way to Keep Kids Entertained Without Screens

5. Neurodivergence: Understanding Brain Differences

Sometimes what appears as hyperactivity is a reflection of how your child’s brain is uniquely wired. Neurodivergence isn’t a flaw to be fixed but a different way of experiencing and interacting with the world.

The Spectrum of Neurodivergence

Neurodivergent children might be gifted, with minds that race from one fascinating idea to another, living with ADHD, experiencing the world with intensity and energy, autistic, processing sensory information differently or twice exceptional (2e), and combining multiple forms of neurodivergence. There are many other brain differences that could make your child neurodivergent such as dyslexia, dysgraphia, dyspraxia, anxiety, OCD, sensory processing disorder, PDA, and more. It’s important to note that each and every child is uniquely wired regardless of a diagnosis or difference or not.  

Giftedness and Hyperactivity

Gifted children often display behaviors that can be mistaken for hyperactivity:

• Intense curiosity and questioning
• Rapid task completion followed by restlessness
• High physical energy paired with intellectual intensity
• Strong emotional responses
• Need for constant mental stimulation

All three of my boys fall into this category. I thought gifted kids were just really smart. Then I read Living With Intensity and realized it’s so much more. This is why a lot of gifted kids and adults are often overlooked or misunderstood. 

Read Next: To The Mom of “That Kid” Who Is Seen For His Behavior (Instead of His Character)

Understanding Twice Exceptionalities

Twice exceptional children face unique challenges. They might be both gifted and have ADHD, or be autistic with exceptional abilities in certain areas. This combination can make it particularly challenging to find appropriate educational support, manage varying levels of ability across different skills, navigate social situations, or handle sensory processing differences. 

What You Can Do Today to Support Your Neurodivergent Child

Rather than trying to make your neurodivergent child conform to neurotypical expectations, focus on:

1. Identifying strengths | Recognize and nurture their unique abilities, create opportunities for them to excel in their areas of interest, and build confidence through strength-based activities.
2. Accommodating differences | Adapt environments to support sensory needs, provide appropriate intellectual challenges, allow for movement and different learning styles, and create flexible routines that work with their natural rhythms.
3. Building support systems | Connect with professionals who understand neurodivergence, find community with other neurodivergent families, advocate for appropriate accommodations in school, and educate family members and caregivers about neurodivergence.
4. Listen to Tilt Parenting podcast | Finding Debbie Reber’s work and podcast completely changed our life for the better! She has incredible resources on how to support your neurodivergent child.

The Gift of Thinking Differently

Remember that neurodivergence often comes with remarkable strengths:

• Creative problem-solving abilities
• Unique perspectives and insights
• Deep passion for specific interests
• Strong pattern recognition
• Innovative and creative thinking

The key is to support these children in ways that honor their unique brain wiring while helping them develop strategies to navigate a world that isn’t necessarily designed for them.

6. Sensory Needs: Being in the Wrong Environment

Many children who appear hyperactive are seeking to meet their brain and body’s sensory needs. When these needs aren’t met appropriately, children may struggle to regulate their behavior and energy levels.

For a deep dive into this topic, I’ve written two comprehensive guides:

• How to Fill Your Child’s Sensory Needs To Reduce Big Behaviors
• The Ultimate Guide: Understanding Sensory Processing Systems in Kids

The School Environment Challenge

Traditional classroom settings often create significant challenges for children with high movement needs. Imagine being asked to sit still in a hard chair for 6-7 hours a day, with minimal breaks for movement. And if you do move in class, you’re considered disruptive and your recess (your one chance to move freely) is taken away as punishment. This was my son’s unfortunate experience until we finally made a change.  

For many children, this is like trying to fit a square peg into a round hole – a traditional classroom simply doesn’t match their neurological and physical needs.

These children often display a range of behaviors in the classroom. The teacher may notice them constantly fidgeting in their chairs or repeatedly asking to use the bathroom simply to get a chance to move their bodies! 

High-energy kids frequently feel physically uncomfortable and restless in their seats. Despite being fully capable of understanding the material, they may struggle to focus on lessons because their brains require movement to learn and feel safe. 

Kids may also experience significant anxiety or stress about the expectation to remain still. Their academic performance may suffer not because of any learning difficulty, but simply because the environment doesn’t match their physical needs. This mismatch between their natural movement needs and the traditional classroom setting can create a daily struggle that impacts their learning and emotional well-being.

Alternative Educational Options

If your child struggles in traditional classroom settings, know that there are alternatives. While not every option is available in every area, consider exploring:

1. Microschools 

This type of educational environment offers an intimate learning environment where children can move and thrive. With their smaller class sizes, teachers can provide individualized attention and adapt to each student’s needs. Microschools typically embrace flexible movement policies, understanding that children learn differently. The accepting atmosphere allows children to learn in ways that best suit their unique learning styles and needs. I worked for Prenda, the largest microschool provider in the U.S. They provide everything you need to attend or start your own microschool! 

2. Homeschool

Homeschooling provides as much flexibility as you want and is often a great learning environment for a hyperactive child. Parents can completely customize the schedule, incorporating movement breaks whenever needed. Learning can happen through active engagement – whether that’s counting while jumping rope or studying biology while taking a nature walk. Every aspect of the learning environment can be tailored to match your child’s natural rhythms and needs. And homeschooling doesn’t need to happen in isolation. You can join a co-op or a homeschooling group so your kids can still get all their energy out with other kids! 

3. Learning Pods

These became popular during the COVID pandemic. They combine the best of structured learning with flexibility. A small group of families share resources and learning experiences, creating an intimate educational setting. This structure provides the social benefits of school while maintaining the flexibility to adapt to children’s needs. There are companies that have learning pods such as KaiPod which is where one of my sons goes twice a week for socialization. 

4. Project-Based Learning Schools

Project-based learning schools reimagine education through active engagement. Instead of sitting at desks, children learn through hands-on experiences and real-world applications. Movement becomes a natural part of the learning process as students work on projects, conduct experiments, and explore their interests. This approach naturally engages children through active doing rather than passive listening.

Between the three of my kids, we are actively involved with every single one of these educational options! If you have any questions about microschools, learning pods, homeschools, or project-based learning schools, comment below or email me. 

Creating Change in Your Community

If these options aren’t available in your area, consider being part of the solution! Many alternative education programs started because parents recognized a need and took action. You might:

• Start a small homeschool co-op with like-minded families
• Research requirements for starting a microschool and start your own! 
• Connect with other parents who share your concerns
• Partner with local educators who understand the importance of movement in learning
• Advocate for more movement opportunities in traditional schools

Remember, choosing an alternative educational path isn’t about giving up on traditional education – it’s about finding the right fit for your child’s unique needs.

If you are unable to change your child’s school environment, don’t lose hope. Work closely with your child’s teacher and the special education team to develop accommodations and support strategies. Many schools can provide movement breaks, flexible seating options, fidget tools, or other accommodations that can help your child succeed within the traditional classroom setting. 

Be open to communicating and advocating for your child’s needs within the existing system. 

Quick Tips for Meeting Sensory Needs

Here are some key points to consider when meeting your child’s sensory needs: 

• Providing regular movement breaks throughout the day can help regulate energy levels.
• Heavy work activities (pushing, pulling, carrying) can have a calming effect.
• Some children need more sensory input than others to feel regulated.
• What looks like hyperactivity might actually be sensory-seeking behavior.

Understanding your child’s unique sensory profile is crucial for supporting their regulation. When we meet these fundamental needs, we often see a natural reduction in hyperactive behavior.

Understanding your child’s unique sensory profile is crucial for supporting their regulation. When we meet these fundamental needs, we often see a natural reduction in hyperactive behavior.

7. Trauma: Underlying Causes of Hyperactivity in Kids

Perhaps the most overlooked cause of hyperactivity in children is trauma. While we often think of trauma as resulting from major life events, it can also stem from less obvious experiences that overwhelm a child’s ability to cope.

Understanding Trauma’s Many Forms

Trauma can be:

• Big T Trauma: significant events like accidents, losses, or abuse
• Little t trauma: ongoing stressors like emotional neglect, unstable environments
• Medical trauma: from procedures, hospitalizations, or chronic illness
• Developmental trauma: disruptions in early attachment or care
• Secondary trauma: from witnessing others’ traumatic experiences

How Trauma Manifests as Hyperactivity

Trauma can lead to high energy in kids. This is also known as hyperarousal, because it causes the body’s nervous system to remain in a heightened state of alertness. This state is often a result of the body being constantly on guard as if it’s always preparing for danger, even when there is none. In this state, the child’s body is flooded with stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol, which can interfere with their ability to regulate emotions and behavior.

You can learn more about this in this article by Child Mind Institute, “Is It ADHD or Trauma?”

Side Note About Pathological Demand Avoidance

One of my sons has an expression of autism called Pathological Demand Avoidance. It’s not well-known yet because it hasn’t been added to the DSM-5 at the time I’m writing this. 

PDA’ers experience extreme anxiety and a near-obsessive need to avoid any perceived demands, even seemingly simple requests, making it feel like their brain is constantly on high alert, similar to how someone might react after experiencing trauma, even if there was no actual traumatic event; this leads to behaviors that can appear out of control, defiant or manipulative, but are actually driven by an overwhelming fear of losing control and being forced to do something they don’t want to do. 

He was a very high-energy toddler with big explosive sensory meltdowns. Now that he’s older and has been able to develop in a neurologically safe environment, he is able to manage his active behaviors and emotional regulation so much better!!

What Hyperarousal Looks Like In Kids

A child in hyperarousal might constantly move or fidget because his or her body is in a “fight or flight” mode, needing to release excess energy. They often struggle to focus or settle down, as their minds are overwhelmed with constant alerts, making it difficult to concentrate on tasks or engage in calm activities.

The heightened startle response can also be a sign, that small noises or changes in the environment may cause an exaggerated reaction.

Additionally, the nervous system’s inability to settle can make transitions from one activity to another difficult. The child may become agitated or resistant, as their brain is stuck in a state of fear or stress. 

Emotional reactivity, such as outbursts or sudden mood swings, can occur because the child’s emotional regulation system is overwhelmed by the heightened state of arousal. 

Finally, trauma-related hyperarousal can interfere with sleep, as the nervous system remains in an alert state, making it hard for the child to relax or fall asleep. These behaviors are often coping mechanisms that help the child manage the ongoing stress their nervous system is experiencing.

The Brain-Body Connection

Trauma lives in the body as much as in the mind. Children who have experienced trauma often:

• Struggle to feel safe in their bodies
• Have difficulty regulating their nervous system
• Use movement as a way to cope with uncomfortable feelings
• Feel an ongoing sense of threat or danger

What You Can Do Today to Support A Child with Unhealed Trauma

1. Create safety | Establish predictable routines, provide consistent, nurturing responses, and create physical and emotional safe spaces. This may also look like allowing children to have control over appropriate choices.
2. Build connection | Prioritize your relationship and attachment over correction and obedience. Working on empathy and understanding through validating feelings and experiences can also create a stronger connection. 

3. Seek support | If your child is stuck in a state of hyperarousal, it may be time to find a trauma-informed professional. Consider play therapy or other age-appropriate interventions. We found the most incredible psychologist who was able to come to our house. She incorporated biofeedback and play therapy which both improved his self-regulation skills and decreased his impulsivity and hyperactive behaviors! You can also join support groups for parents.
4. Build a network of understanding caregivers | This was mentioned earlier but advocate, advocate, advocate. 

The Path to Healing

Recovery from trauma is possible, but it requires:

• Patience and understanding
• Professional support when needed
• Recognition that healing isn’t linear
• Focus on building resilience
• Understanding that behavior is communication

Remember that children showing signs of trauma need professional support. While we can create supportive environments at home, trauma work should be guided by qualified mental health professionals.

How to Support Your High Energy Kid

Understanding these seven hidden causes of hyperactivity in kids opens new paths for supporting our children. Rather than viewing hyperactivity as simply a behavior problem to be controlled, we can look deeper to understand what our children’s bodies and minds are trying to tell us.

Every child’s journey is unique, and often multiple factors contribute to hyperactive behavior. By taking a holistic approach and addressing these underlying causes, we can help our children find balance and thrive in their own way.

Remember to work with appropriate healthcare providers as you explore these different areas. While this information provides a starting point for understanding your child’s behavior, professional guidance can help you create a targeted plan that addresses your child’s specific needs.

Free Hyperactive Kid Toolkit

To help you navigate your child’s hyperactivity, I created a toolkit that’s easy to use to help you know what to do! I have parents email me all the time because they don’t know what to do with their high energy toddler or school-aged child’s hyperactive behaviors especially if they’re struggling in school.

You can use this toolkit to advocate for your kids and discover the causes of their hyperactive behaviors! 

Parenting a child with a lot of energy can feel hard at times and like you’re the only one with a child like that, but please know you’re not alone. I’m here to support you through this journey. If this blog post resonates with you or you want personalized guidance, email me at adriane@raisingkidswithpurpose.com or drop a comment below. Together, we can help your child thrive.

Disclosure

While I’ve extensively researched these topics and speak from personal experience, I want to be clear that I’m not a medical professional, registered dietitian, or licensed healthcare provider. The information in this post is for educational purposes only and shouldn’t replace professional medical advice. Every child is unique, and what works for one may not work for another. Always consult with your child’s healthcare provider before making significant changes to their diet or routine, especially if they have existing medical conditions or are taking medications. The suggestions in this article are based on research and personal experience, but they should be evaluated in the context of your child’s specific needs and medical history.