Intentional Movement for Stressed Out Moms: Lead by Example

Learn how intentional movement can be a lifeline for stressed out moms! Guest blogger, Rachel DeSonier, shares how strength training saved her sanity while raising six kids under age 7, including foster care and a son with sudden behavioral changes. She breaks down the science behind exercise and stress management, giving you simple movement patterns you can start today to help your body handle overwhelm better!

Guest Post by: Rachel DeSonier

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Adriane (the host of this fantastic blog you are reading right now) is allowing me to come on here and share with you how exercise (specifically-strength training) saved my sanity during one of the most difficult seasons of my life. 

You’re here because you are probably a little like me.

I have a few kids who don’t “fit” inside the box. 

Traditional parenting approaches don’t really work for them (and sometimes make things worse). 

So, I get it. 

The calls from the principal. 

The screaming rage fits. 

The melt-downs. 

The defiance. 

The I-can’t-explain-this-behaviors (why are we peeing in other people’s laundry baskets??) 

I really get it. 

Why am I over here on a parenting blog when I’m a strength training coach? 

Because strength training saved my bacon. (Also-Jesus, but that’s another blog post).

 Ok, I’ll get to the story now… 

My Story: Six Kids & Endless Stress

A little background first 

A few years ago, this was my life: foster parent with 2 adopted kids, 3 bio kids, and 1 (very feisty) foster baby. All 6 kids under age 7..8? Somewhere around there. 

One of my sons was in public school at the time (first grade), and one day, he changed. I still remember it like it was a switch. He’s always been a “challenging” kid, but he was doing pretty well, and one week he just…changed. 

Screaming rage fits, acting out at school, defiance, anger, calls from the principal…the whole thing. Needless to say, I was a stressed out mom. That’s putting it mildly. Because, remember, he’s only one of my six kids. 

Read Next: Why You Feel Like an Overwhelmed Mom and What To Do About It

It went on for about 9 months!

We went to the doctors, met with the behavior coaches at the school, and I was desperately trying to hang on to my sanity while also not sleeping because of the baby.

I remember vividly one day, I went to pick him up from camp as they were doing their closing camp song.  I had to hold him down while they were releasing camp because he would not stop trying to run away. 

Totally dysregulated. 

My baby and my toddler were running around loose, and some kind camp counselors corralled them for me.

I remember when I got everyone buckled in the van and just feeling like I was being crushed by a mountain of anxiety. I can actually feel it while typing these words out. 

The physical key to managing anxiety

The whole time we were dealing with this, I would take the kids to the YMCA and drop them in the childcare and go work out for an hour. I would get some intentional movement in!

Eventually, I started noticing that while my life was still incredibly stressful, the strength training seemed to take the “edge” off. 

When I was lifting, it was like I could feel the tension releasing from my body. The build-up of anxiety in my mind and body was being physically channelled to lift this heavy weight again and again…and it felt great. I always felt so much better afterwards. 

I started looking into this, and realized (shocker) that intentional movement and exercise sort of “trains” your body how to respond to cortisol (your stress hormone) more efficiently. 

While I was pretty much always in fight or flight mode, because of my exercise routine, my body was better able to manage those cortisol spikes because it had been practicing that with my strength training sessions.

Before I get to the main point of what I want you to understand about this, my son is doing much better. Turns out, there were some medical things going on with him, and while it’s been a rocky road since, he has improved so much.

Related: How to Take Care of MYSELF With Self-Care so I Can Give More to My Family

How to help your body learn how to handle stress better

If you are a chronically stressed out mom (and if you’re here, you probably are) then you need intentional movement to help your body learn how to handle that better. 

A great way to do this is through strength training. 

There are other benefits such as increased muscle mass, higher metabolism, increased bone density, less risk of falls later in life, better functionality, and hormones…need I go on?

Just a few simple training sessions and intentional movements per week can help you work that stress out of your body-so you can be a calmer, more regulated mom to deal with whatever life (or your kids) throws your way. 

Bonus: You model healthy stress management for your kids, too. As the saying goes, “more is caught than taught”. 

How to start strength training 

Here’s a great place to start: Focus on functional movement patterns. 

Basically, this means you are squatting, hinging your hips, pushing up, or pulling. 

What this looks like practically: The “compound” movement patterns like squat, deadlift, overhead press, bench press, and rows. 

These are movements that you use daily and they use multiple muscle groups in your body. 

This means you get a great workout in less time. That’s a win in my book! 

If you’ve never lifted weights or done any strength training before, start where you are at.* 

For most of you, this is body weight stuff or very light weights, such as: 

• 10-12 bodyweight squats (onto a chair if needed)
• 10-12 hip thrusts on the side of your bed
• 10-12 overhead presses with soup cans

Show up for you, so you can show up for your kids 

At the end of the day, intentional movement isn’t just about building muscle or chasing a number on the scale. It’s about creating a stronger, calmer, more resilient version of yourself so you can show up for the people who need you most. Like your kids. 

Strength training gave me an outlet when life felt overwhelming, and it continues to give me margin to breathe, think clearly, and parent with a little more patience (on most days 😉). 

My hope is that you’ll see it not as “one more thing to do” but as one of the best tools in your mom-toolbox for both physical and mental health, especially when you feel like a stressed out mom!

So start small. 

Start with bodyweight squats in your living room if that’s all you can manage. 

Simply start. 

And if that feels too hard, I’d love to help you! Check out my Fit Lifestyle in a Box program.  

Because the truth is that your kids are watching.

When they see you going from being a stressed out mom to one who manages her stress in a healthy way, showing up consistently, engaging in intentional movement, and caring for her body, you’re teaching them by example what it looks like to lead a healthy, resilient life.

 And mom, that’s a legacy worth lifting for. 💪 

*A note on HIIT (High Intensity Interval Training). Don’t do too much because, without proper recovery and rest in between it can actually be counterproductive.